Lessons from Peter Pan

Our family attended a local presentation of the play, Peter Pan.  It was performed by YES Company.  YES Company is a group of students who come together each summer, to learn, grow, entertain and have fun.  It is a life changing program.  I was delighted and amazed by the dedication and talent that I witnessed.  The students didn't just learn their lines, hit the right notes and master dance steps.  The program includes guest speakers who taught them fencing, the historical perspective of the story of Peter Pan, smart choices regarding exercise, proper nutrition and the proper care and wearing of  theatrical costumes.  And that is just the beginning.  Imagination was used, teamwork with shared duties, strength of character and compassion for others.  The courage for the flying stunts is certainly not taken for granted. I could write this entire blog on the positive aspects of YES Company.  I have such love and admiration for the people who keep YES Company going.  Thank you.

The story of Peter Pan has been a family favorite, especially for my daughter Kelly, who has the nickname of Tinkerkell and lived in a fairy room for many years.  We have been known to say, "I do believe in fairies, I do."  And not in a sarcastic voice either....The play started with an orchestra playing haunting music and right away charm, danger, and humor pulled us into the story of Peter Pan. We were thrilled to visit Neverland again.

In real life there are definitely days I want to sing, "I Won't Grow Up" over and over, at the top of my lungs.  Some days it might be fun to dance to Ugh-A-Wug and pretend to be Tiger Lily instead of my standard work out, though Coach Eric has enough WUG to make any "play out" fun. Maybe the next time you are being interviewed and feeling short on confidence you could burst into the song, "I've Gotta Crow."  The lesson from Captain Hook and the crocodile was especially important to me.  The sound tick-tock...tick-tock... immediately translated to live now...live now.

The responsibilities of adulthood are many.  Peter Pan shows us that there is a happy medium between the innocence of childhood and the inevitable transition to adulthood.  We could all use a little Peter Pan or Tinkerbell attitude in our daily lives. Just don't get too carried away. On those days when we are wishing for Neverland, think about what you can change to make your life better.  And then do it.

Tick-tock.

Tick-tock.

Live now.

Live now.

Hacking into Happiness

Being happy 
is not an unauthorized mystery 
that we have to figure out, discover or buy.  

Happiness is a choice.

Treat these ideas as a way of gaining more access to your happy world.

1.  Gratitude is counting your blessings.  Science says if it is written down and shared with others it will make a bigger impact on your level of happiness.  (And we wouldn't doubt science, would we?)

2.  Close ties with spouse, partner, family and friends are one of the most important ways to hack into happiness.  You are the average of your five closest friends. Choose wisely.  

3.  Movement (aka exercise) will get you feeling better almost immediately.  Do it now and do it often.  (Really...stand up, do a few jumping jacks or wiggle......are you smiling?)

4.  Meditate to gain clarity, increase awareness and it will make you happier.  You have no idea how good you're going to feel unless you do it.  I call it stillness and there is no right or wrong way to do it.  

5.  Ask yourself-How can I be happier?  Be aware, think practical strategies.  It will lead to a better life.  You are the only one who can come up with the "right" answers.

6.  Make a choice to be better.  Commit to a conscious decision to grow.  Make a difference, help someone, mentor a child, invent something.  Go outside your comfort zone and take responsibility to make your life what you dream about.

Happiness hacks can help figure out what you need to do.

Try one, some or even all. 

It starts with the you, your attitude and the choice.

you. happier. 

Journey

I am on a journey.  I am not necessarily going anywhere by plane, boat or car.  I don't need a map, gas or gps.  I just need to accept this journey.  I need to slow down.  I need stillness.  I need to do the bare minimums.  

I am on a journey from doing to being.  

Want to come along for the ride?
Start your own journey.
Accept that your bowl is empty.
Instead of what can I do, ask who can I be?

Sometimes we have more than we want but less than we need.  
Where do you start?
Nowhere.
Just be.

Tweak not twerk.

Life is a whirlwind.

We try to  live a "normal" life.

But what is a normal life?

I am off from the library for a month trying on a "pretend" retirement.   I am always busy and there is so much going on.  I felt like if I didn't work at the library then I would have a "normal" retirement and life.  I have been off for a week and my life is crazier and more busy than usual. 

When life is in a flux and there is continuous change, 

it sometimes makes me forget to be thankful. 

Even when I am getting an estimate to get my car fixed from an accident, 

I am thankful that no one was seriously injured.

Even when we are stuck in traffic for a long time, 

I am thankful we are all together, have air conditioning and snacks.

Even when I am spending the day taking care of bills and other paperwork, 

I am thankful I have enough money to pay those bills.  

Even when I am not able to sleep because my brain won't shut off, 

I am thankful that I have people in my life to worry about and love.

Even when I am feeling unsteady looking at houses to buy, 

I am thankful I have a lovely home to live in.

Even when the news is bad, 

I am thankful I try to look beyond and find the good.

I thought my "pretend" retirement would lead to a "normal" life.  I imagined days of waking up when I wanted, having time for meditation and pool time. Work outs were done in the cool of the day and with joy. I had a day dream of no chores and all my work being caught up. Actually reading all my library books with no fine. You know, the perfect life.

There are not enough hours in the day to do all we want to do, no matter if we are retired or not.  

Choosing how we spend our minutes, leads to days, weeks, months and yes, how we live our lives. 

I am thinking my "normal" life and retirement is really my real life.

Maybe it is time to tweak (not twerk) life a little bit:  

• Add in the pool time as non negotiable.

• Workouts are more fun when cool, but I can be hot for 30 minutes.

• Some days I can wake up when I want.

• Meditation is stillness and silence, not something on a to-do list.  

• Chores, if kept up, can be managed.

• Taking care of business, I was able to retire, keep on doing that.

• Read, pay the fines to support the library when I don't finish on time.

Does any of this help me figure out how to live during this month of "pretend" retirement?

No, but what I am realizing is that I get to choose how I feel about my life and I am thankful for all my life has in it.  I relish those "perfect" days of doing bare minimums and resting, just as I rise to the occasion when I need to be on task and move along.  

I have been an all or nothing perfectionist all my life.  I want to live in the gray area.  Not all, not nothing.  Just right.  A little rest, a little work, a little play, a little of whatever I need to live my best life. 

Maybe I am already living my best life 

and I just needed to notice that

and tweak as needed. 

I hope you are living your best life.

If so, be thankful.

If not, tweak it.

Christmas in July

When my children were young, I would start Christmas shopping in July.  

I wanted to be finished before Thanksgiving, including all wrapping.  

If I accomplished this it would take the stress out of the holiday.  

We could listen to Christmas music, watch the tree lights, snuggle, decorate cookies and just have fun.  

(That's my story and I'm sticking to it!)

I would begin by brainstorming and making a list.  I had categories for gifts that were in place since that first Christmas when Lexy was born.  The categories included a doll/stuffed animal, jewelry, educational toy, toy, music, book, sister gift, a big Santa gift and stocking stuffers.  If it didn't fit into the specific categories it became a stocking stuffer, sometimes sitting beside the stockings in a pile.  

It was all too much!

I also needed to find the "perfect" ornament for each daughter.  It needed to be meaningful and identify something from their year.  Oh, and there was also the Christmas Eve video and pajamas too.  Dennis usually had to work on Christmas Eve day and to make our day easier to handle "Santa" left a video on the tree to occupy time and reduce the "When is Daddy coming home?" questions.  We would snuggle in with popcorn and make it a celebration.  After Christmas Eve dinner was the annual pajama gift, to start the winding down of the evening and get ready for the Reindeer Food sprinkling.   A lot of these traditions evolved and then were gone.  The video tradition was deleted when there was so much arguing over what video they wanted that there had to be two. 

It was all too much!

The decorating has also become less and less and last year there was none, not even a wreath or table centerpiece.  No one wanted to sit and watch the tree lights or even help put on the decorations anymore.  We would remember to do the advent calendar every few days.  It became my "job" only.  I do miss the Christmas tree smell.  

It was all too much!

Presents evolved also.  No more categories.  We moved onto drawing names for the 4 of us and had a limit of $25.00.  We have now gone to no gifts or stockings at all.  We started our "no gifts for our family" tradition by sending holiday boxes to Marines serving our country.  It was my daughters' idea to said send some more boxes and don't do gifts for our family so that became a tradition.  The last few years we have donated gifts to the UC Davis Children's hospital.  It is fun and we help so many sick children.  We love doing this together and will continue this tradition. We are finished with our shopping before Thanksgiving and don't wrap anything.  

Christmas in July is part of my Right Size project.  I am going through all our Christmas boxes and passing on what we don't want or use which is most of it. However, I won't be giving away the stockings (I really like the stocking tradition! HINT! HINT! It could make a comeback this year?).  There are stuffed animals, books, advent calendars, santa plates, santas, decorations and so much more.  

How much is enough?  

What do I really want to keep? 

But as you know, all these "things" don't make Christmas.  

Christmas lives in our hearts all year long.  

It is a season of love and giving. 

As I go through boxes and decide what goes and what stays, I will be reminiscing.  

I will be reliving those fun moments.

  

I am thankful that we have those special memories. 

I am thankful that we have kept some of the traditions. 

I am even more thankful we have evolved and changed our traditions to fit the family we are now. 

Are you happy with your 

Christmas season 

and traditions?

Do you need to release traditions 

that aren't working anymore?

What can you embrace to make it a special year?

I wish you love and peace during this Christmas in July "right size" project time.  

I won't be sending cards!