Thongs

I have had these thongs for over 40 years.  

They have been water skiing.

They have been camping.

They have been to many pools.

They have gone on many vacations.

They have been in closets and out.

They have been packed for every move.

They have made every cut in decluttering.

They are not perfect.

There is a tear in the left one.

They are good enough.

In this picture they are buried in the sand but surrounded by beauty.

Kind of like life...surrounded by beauty but feeling a little buried.

My girls are horrified that I call them thongs.

They tell me they are flip flops.

I would be horrified if anyone thought I wore a thong.

So meet my new "old" flip flops.

They were with me this weekend to celebrate my birthday at the ocean!

How old is a treasure that you have hung onto?

Superpowers

What would you attempt 

to do 

if you knew 

you could not fail? 

The other night I asked my two daughters this question. We each had different answers, that ranged from strictly personal goals to ending world suffering and sickness.  It makes me think about lots of ideas that would be fun and could make the world better too.  

I think to really have this be possible we would need a few superpowers:

• Controlling Weather...drought here in California needs some help.
• Eat Anything...oh my...be still my heart...imagine!
• Flight...kind of boring.
• Mind Control....now we're talking.
• Spider Webs...ok for Halloween.
• Time Travel...could really mess up the past which then affects the future.
• X Ray Vision...would I still need to wear my contact lens?
• Super-Hearing, Speed, and Strength...all have been done before.

We are attracted to Superman, Captain America, Iron Man, BatMan, Green Lantern and others because of their superpowers.   My personal favorite is Wonder Woman. I mean, a Lasso of Truth?  Can it get any better? What I could do with a Lasso of Truth! 

Superhero superpowers are conducive to making the world a better place. 

But I think we can make the world better just using our own superpowers.

Kindness, empathy and love are a good place to start.

Throw in making a decision to be happy and taking action.

Add smiling which  has some superpower benefits and we can use it every day. 

We also have some evil superpowers like guilt and shame.  Those are not helping us or the world. We need to use that famous Lasso of Truth and banish them. Only positive Superpowers are used in my story. Creative license, you know.  

Happiness is a superpower.  

It blazes and inflicts positivity until we have a new reality.  

Be a super hero and choose happiness.

Make a difference.

Change the world.

What would you attempt to do if you knew 

you could not fail? 

AND

What superpowers would you use to accomplish it?

Optimist or Pessimist?

There is a song by Paramore called: For a Pessimist, I'm Pretty Optimistic.  I really like the title and it has brought a few laughs to some in our family who have been accused of having a negativity bias.   

Lately I have been complaining, whining, being a little negative and definitely overthinking life.  I have made pro and con lists, to do lists, not-to-do lists and have been giving too much credit to the thoughts bouncing around in my head. It is difficult to be taken seriously when the thoughts are really just pouting and venting. 

If you think too much, you can create problems that were not there to begin with. You can have those skeptical thoughts become gloomy then angst sets in and before you know it you are in despair and your daughter could be saying, "For an optimist, you are pretty pessimistic."  

(Not that this is necessarily a true story, and if it was I would change the names to protect the innocent.)  

Sometimes we have a tendency to be caught in a mental loop of overthinking.  It can ruin the situation, twist things around, make you worry and it can make everything much worse than it actually is.  

Rumination-break the habit!

Being a happiness teacher does not guarantee that life is always perfect or even fun. Cheerfulness, hope and confidence are not given with that title.  

Those positive traits are earned and learned.  

They take practice and practice and even more practice.

There is no perfect.

Two facts from The Happiness Journey by Bob and Virginia Pothier:

• Our brains are not built to make us happy.
• Our brains are built to latch onto negativity and to treat it as overly important.

When rumination and over thinking take over, it can be linked to bouts of increased sadness, difficulty solving problems and decreased motivation, concentration and drive.  It is an unhealthy and dangerous mental habit.  It can be a slippery slope to navigate. 

I believe that what you think about becomes your life.   

So if you are on this path, snap out of it.

Use tools of positivity to keep going on your happiness journey.

Remember that happiness is not the absence of unhappiness.

It doesn't matter if the glass is half empty or half full because...

1. The glass has air in it so I believe it is always full!
2. Be glad you have a glass!

What I know for sure is that there are days I feel overwhelmed and a little over the top heading towards pessimism but most days are filled with positive thoughts and making progress towards being an optimist.  

What's in your glass? 

Try

I recently attended a Colbie Caillat concert.
She is an amazing singer/songwriter and her performance was sizzling.
She sparkled and tugged at our hearts.
Jason Mraz even sang a song with her, while on Skype or some other platform.

In the program bio there was a line about her song, Try, from the new Gypsy Heart album.  It explains that this song is "an anthem for women to accept who they are and be comfortable showing it and not hiding it from one another."  As she sang the song, with the video playing behind her, I felt an explosion of emotions.  The video showed women of different ages, all made up and also with natural faces and hair.  It was a powerful statement.  The emotions I felt were many.  I imagine each person is seeing and feeling differently while watching this video.

Watch the music video for Try


Here are the lyrics for Try by Colbie Caillat:

Oooh
Oooh

Put your make-up on
Get your nails done
Curl your hair
Run the extra mile
Keep it slim so they like you, do they like you?

Get your sexy on
Don't be shy, girl
Take it off
This is what you want, to belong, so they like you
Do you like you?

You don't have to try so hard
You don't have to, give it all away
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don't have to change a single thing

You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try
Yooou don't have to try

Oooh
Oooh

Get your shopping on, at the mall, max your credit cards
You don't have to choose, buy it all, so they like you
Do they like you?

Wait a second,
Why, should you care, what they think of you
When you're all alone, by yourself, do you like you?
Do you like you?

You don't have to try so hard
You don't have to, give it all away
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don't have to change a single thing

You don't have to try so hard
You don't have to bend until you break
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don't have to change a single thing

You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try

You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try
Yooou don't have to try

Oooh
Oooh

You don't have to try so hard
You don't have to, give it all away
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don't have to change a single thing

You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try, try, try, try
You don't have to try
You don't have to try

Take your make-up off
Let your hair down
Take a breath
Look into the mirror, at yourself
Don't you like you?
Cause I like you

As you read these words, listen to Colbie Caillat sing them or watch the music video,  

I wonder what is going through your mind and how your heart feels. 

Do you feel the hurt?  

Do you feel the sadness?  

Do you feel the love?  

Do you feel the power?

What do you feel?   

It is not about makeup and what we look like!

It is not about changing to fit into the mold of "everyone else".

It is not about caring what others think.

It is not about size, age or color.

  

It is about being you.  

It is about accepting who you are.

It is about knowing what is important, to you.

It is about liking yourself.

This song is important.

These lyrics are life changing.

The message is critical.

Listen.

Think.

Pass it on.

Don't you like you?

Cause I like you.

Thank you Colbie Caillat, 

for making a difference.  

            

And a big shout out to Alex & Sierra, who are totally awesome and the whole reason we went to the concert!  Check out this song by them.  

Scarecrow by Alex & Sierra  

Small Wonders

Maybe life doesn't get any better than this, 

or any worse, 

and what we get is just what we're willing to find: 

small wonders, 

where they grow.

-Barbara Kingsolver

What are you looking for?

Are you willing to find it?

Do you see the small wonders in your life?

I wonder........

Where Are You Going?

Contentment

Contentment is not the fulfillment 

of what you want, 

but the realization of 

how much you already have.

-Anonymous

What does contentment mean to you?  I believe that in our happiness journey,  being content has to do with satisfaction that reaches a level which is different for everyone.  My level of achievement and good fortune is not the same as your idea of a good life.  Not wishing for more is a fluid place for me.  

How much is enough? 

Enough happiness, health, money, love or anything.  

When do we not wish for more?  

I believe the answer to that is in the now.  

Now is enough. 

There is a line from the book, The Fault in Our Stars by John Green that says, "it occurred to me that the voracious ambition of humans is never sated by dreams coming true, because there is always the thought that everything might be done better and again."  Wow, that is deep and worth thinking about.  When one dream comes true we sometimes critique it and say it could have been better or if I had it to do over...and on and on. So where is the contentment or the acknowledgment of how much you already have or that has been done? We quickly move on to the next, best thing and leave behind the feeling of enough.  Augustus, one of that characters in the book, makes a remark about Hazel and how he sees her impact on the world because "real heroes are the people NOTICING things, paying attention."  We do not have to be dying to have this attitude or impact.  We can notice our life and pay attention to the now.  What follows is contentment.  Your kind of contentment.

Life is how you look at it...ugliness or beauty.

Life is how we hear it...complaining or uplifting.

Life is how we imagine it...nightmare or dream.

Life is how we feel it...fear or love.

Life is how we anticipate it...sad or happy.

Life is how we live it...wishing for more or contentment.

Choose to live life with contentment.

Life becomes how we live it.

Enough. 

Now.